Eulogy Expanded (2)

When I came to the next lines of the eulogy, I couldn't go on. When I first wrote them and spoke them, I didn't realize how tragic they were.
Here's the translation of what I said:

• Asher was a brave person.

• He did not avoid risk.

• He was quick to decide and quick to act.

We think that Asher died for those very reasons. He apparently started off on the wrong trail into the Colca Canyon, and when he reached a difficult place, instead of turning back, he decided to try and get past it: he was brave, he did not avoid risk, he decided and acted quickly.

That was not what I had in mind consciously when I wrote those words. I wasn't thinking of physical courage but of the courage he needed to drop out of a secure program in art school, where he was doing well, and to try his luck in the hard and competitive world of New York. I wasn't thinking of danger to his life, but of the risk of trying something new, time after time.

After he finished the cooking course, he got a job at the Core Club, an extremely exclusive private club for the wealthy and well-connected on Manhattan. He worked there for six grueling months, getting up at 4:30 in the morning so he could be at work by six and start cooking breakfast for the members. He stayed on through lunch and then went home and collapsed. The cuisine there was on the highest gourmet level, and at the time Asher was planning to stay on a path that would lead him, eventually, to become a gourmet chef. However, after six months, the club started faltering, he was working fewer hours, and enjoying it less and less, until he finally quit and started out in an entirely different direction by taking over the kitchen of the tapas bar. Once he made up his mind to leave the Core Club, it didn't take him long to do it: quick to decide and quick to act.

If Asher had been more cautious and less impetuous, he would probably be alive now, but he wouldn't have been the Asher we loved, admired, worried about, and treasured.